50 Things You May Not Know About Me

1. I get butterflies when I see Ben’s name on my caller ID.
2. I sing at the top of my lungs in my van.
3. I wish I looked on the outside the way I feel on the inside.
4. I love working at the school and knowing the staff and teachers.
5. I have read the Book of Mormon 4 times…almost 5.
6. Mothering my kids has been the best thing I have EVER done, and the hardest.
7. I was in a car accident and broke the side window out with my head...no long term damage...I think.
8. I am terrible at keeping in touch with friends when they move away, but I never forget them.
9. I love mangos.
10. I have a blast body boarding with my boys.
11. I would love to parachute one day.
12. I have a secret fear of foreign travel...but I want to get over it.
13. I have eaten shark, squid and octopus and I am not a huge fan of seafood.
14. Almond Joys are my favorite candy bar.
15. Root beer is my favorite soda pop, with Strawberry Fanta a close second.
16. I don't drink caffeine.
17. My right ear has 2 piercings and my left has 4, but I only ever wear one pair of earrings now.
18. I have a really hard time talking on the phone...I need body language cues to be comfortable in a conversation.
19. I have been a 1st responder to three different car accidents, two of which changed me forever.
20. I was a terrible college student, until I had to pay for it myself and then...straight A's.
21. I had a mad crush on my History professor. He called and asked me out after the semester was over. I had just gotten married.
22. I failed Chemistry my Junior year of High School and had to take it again as a Senior.
23. In High School I lettered in Theater, Basketball (I managed the Varsity boys team, ooo-la-la), and believe it or not...Business.
24. I lived in the Pineview Apts. in Rexburg, Idaho as a Freshman and Sophomore at Ricks College.
25. When I was 17, my best friend, Tami and I drove from Longmont, Co to Colorado Springs, Co in a cherry red convertible...in bikinis...during rush hour.
26. I have cruised Main St. in Longmont, Co probably close to 400 times.
27. I have never been arrested.
28. I have never gotten a tattoo.
29. I love semi-sweet chocolate chips.
30. I want to write a book some day.
31. I have been the stage manager for many high school and community theater productions.
32. I hate to dust and mate socks.
33. When I retire I want to have chickens.
34. I don't know enough about politics...it embarrasses me...and it should.
35. Staying busy keeps me from the brink of depression.
36. I am afraid of Black Widows.
37. I love having the Elders over for dinner.
38. Sometimes I fall asleep saying my prayers.
39. I have been skinny-dipping.
40. I had to look up "got vs. gotten" to be grammatically correct.
41. I make friends easily but I often feel shy. I avoid confrontation like the plague.
42. I love musicals. Seven Brides for Seven Brothers is my favorite.
43. Bee stings make me swell HUGE.
44. I am a divorcee and I am so glad.
45. I read Twilight years before it was cool.
46. I have permanent retainers on the back of both my top and bottom teeth.
47. I love the Food Network.
48. I don't know how to do a cart-wheel.
49. I won a fire starting contest the same day that I won an archery contest.
50. I fantasize about clandestine rendezvous. (With my one and only, of course!)

Living The Dream

I walked into the kitchen today and found Spencer drinking out of a 2-liter rootbeer bottle. I scolded. He explained that his dad had given him the bottle and asked him to "kill" the remaining rootbeer. I partly apologized but still reinforced to him the yuckiness of germ sharing. He nodded his understanding and then continued to "kill" the leftovers. When he finished he handed me the bottle and walked into the front room whispering to himself, "Yeah, livin' the dream!"

Humbled

Wow, my last post was a huge pitty party.

Thanks for coming.

I am embarrassed, especially since emily, the origin of the embrace the camera idea somehow read my post. I feel like a jerk.

To Emily:
I apologize for tainting your great idea and challenge with my issues.

To the rest of you:
I apologize for spouting my insecurities all over my blog. My kids do deserve to have pictures of me. If I don't like what I look like in pictures then it is up to me to do something about that.

I will try!

When you see pictures of me on this blog please note them...they will come at a huge personal sacrifice.

Embrace The Camera?? Not On Your Life!

I just read a really great post on someone else's blog

...super cute and inspiring...

about making sure you take pictures of yourself with your kids.

"Mom's are always behind the camera...kids need/want pictures of themselves with their mothers."

I read some of the comments made by her blog followers and was inspired by the overwhelming support of the idea to photo-document not only a child's life but also a child's life with his mother, regardless of slept in velour pant suits or greasy hair.

I raised my hand in support and felt a swell of pride and community when I read about setting your camera on timer mode at least once every day this week.

I was inspired...for about 5 seconds.

It was then that I noticed that all the followers who had commented looked...well like the blogger herself...lovely. Why wouldn't you want to take pictures of yourself, in your thin bodies, perfect hair and darling clothes. Of course you can jump on that bus.

Seriously, that horrid slept in velour pant suit and greasy hair look is what I look like on a good day!

I don't want pictures of me right now...especially for my kids to look back on.

I don't want them to remember what I look like,

overweight and exhausted.

I will spend my time building solid happy memories for my children instead. Memories that after 20 years will be slightly maleable.

"Remember when we played on the Slip N' Slide for hours... and I was wearing a bikini and super tan?"

"Remember that time we did each other's nails and make up... and I was thin and had fresh highlights in my hair?"

See, I don't see anything wrong with this.

I aknowledge my selfishness and insecurities to a point but I am still photo-documenting my children's lives...have you noticed much? I just don't feel like initiating the camera's self timer at this point in my dirty clothes, stringy hair, pimple faced, chubby body life.

I can not embrace the camera!

However,

I think I may take the "embrace the camera" challenge to heart and shoot for 6 months from now. Thanks for the wake up call Emily!

Some Of My Summer Favorites!

Fish vs. Fruit

Emma and Spencer went to a fun birthday party on Saturday. When they came home they were the proud owners of seven, yes SEVEN, goldfish. Now, while I love fish...they require very little care and can be eaten in an emergency...I didn't have adequate housing for SEVEN goldfish. I emptied out my large hurricane vase that I had filled with citrus fruit on the table and added water+fish to make a new and ever changing centerpiece. It was a quick fix and let's be honest...goldfish don't last that long.

On Sunday, after Primary, Emma came bounding up to me waving a small scrap of paper in her hand.

In one seven year old breath: "I told Sister J about my new fish. I told her that we didn't have a home for them so you put them in the fruit jar. I told her that I was sad that we didn't get to have fruit anymore. She was sad too. She said kids need to eat fruit. She told me that she had a fish tank we could have so that we could have fruit again. Here is her number."

She skipped away happily.

I hate it when my kids make me feel like and, even worse, look like a delinquent parent. WE STILL HAVE FRUIT!! It's just in the fridge.

I am definitely getting the Mom of the Year Award, this year. Thanks a lot, stinkin' goldfish.

Grandma and Grandpa Dawson Come to California

This last weekend we had such a wonderful visit with Ben's parents. Even though we ran around so busy, running errands, watching soccer games and chasing kids we enjoyed their help and company. Joyce caught me up on laundry and Lowell patiently listened to the kids tell him all about their lives. We watched Michael play soccer, welcomed Jasen home from camp, had a cook out on the beach and even walked the pier during San Clemente's Ocean Festival. It was a lot of fun! Thanks Mom and Dad!! Come again!! The sooner the better!!